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Trouble

I don’t go looking for trouble, but it always finds me. I didn’t go looking for a husband, but he walked into my life and sat at the counter at Denny’s. I had no idea that tall stranger with blue eyes would change my world.

I didn’t go looking for someone to kick start my mid life crisis, but then M followed me on Twitter. He led me to the Dark Side, and showed me how erotic conversations could be.

I had no idea you could be in love with more than one person, then J showed me that was possible. I always knew there was no way we could be together, but he taught me so many things I needed to learn. He was a step in the process of me accepting myself as bisexual as well.

I didn’t know that I could be attracted to a woman, but then K taught me that. She was a good friend for about a year, then she taught me how it easy it was for someone to dismiss me from their life. And how much that hurt.

My best friend, Don, was my bisexual mentor. He taught me the things I needed to know to accept that I am bisexual. I would have been lost without his guidance when I first came out.

I didn’t go looking for friends on WordPress, but I met Rob (Kdaddy23) He has also been a friend who happens to be bisexual. He has listened to me many times when I really needed a friend.

I did not go looking for Trouble, but she found me. She messaged me on Twitter. Frankly, she was my first lesbian I talked with intimately. I needed her at that point in my life. We both needed each other as friends. My emotions got a little carried away for a while, but I think of her as a friend again.

I must admit, I did go looking for Misty. I answered her Craigslist ad. We went out a few times, and she gave me my first sexual experience with another woman. I don’t know what I would call other, other than a casual friend, but she did give me that one memorable night.

I’ve had many people come and go in my life over the years. Some were good, some were bad experiences. But I’ve learned from all of them. I learned how not to treat people. You don’t ignore someone who is worried about you, and think that it’s ok. (By the way, I just called my mom) I learned that people ignoring you teaches you to live without them. I learned that men and women can be friends, but there can always be sexual tension.

I really don’t go looking for trouble, it shows up on my screen. It makes me want things I can’t have. It tempts me to do things I know I shouldn’t be doing. But I have learned when to back off now. I won’t let my emotions get carried away again. I’m learning to avoid trouble.

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