When I came out as bisexual, I wasn’t expecting anyone to be happy for me. I expected some negativity. What I didn’t expect was outright rejection by the nieces I always thought of as the closest thing I would have to my own kids.

My niece C was visiting from Germany with her sister, G in Pennsylvania, just about a 90 minute drive from me. She was there for at least two weeks. I wasn’t invited to come see them, or to even meet then somewhere for a meal.

Yesterday C posted pictures of Facebook, because she went to visit her mom, and her grandmother (my mom) in Florida. My brother Eddie flew up there to see them. Anyway, she was going on about family.

On Facebook, I posted, “I guess I’m not family anymore. Nice to know.” She messaged me on Facebook, saying she hoped what she said didn’t make me feel like family. No explanation for why I couldn’t have been included in anything they did up here.

I just said that inactions speak louder than words. And if I’m not welcome, than I’m not welcome. I know you can’t please anyone, but damn it, I was only a short drive away. I wasn’t expecting her to come to me.

I never expected my nieces to be as narrow minded as their mother. (She’s the one who told me I had the devil in me when I came out to her) I’m not going to lie, it hurts.

My family now is me, my husband, and my dogs. I’m not going to fight their prejudice. I only hope that none of their kids turn out to be LGBT.

The rejections hurts. But what is actually more painful, is realizing that my own family members are narrow minded bigots. Life goes on I guess.


5 thoughts on “Rejection

  1. And this is one of the biggest problems about coming out. You can expect people outside of your family to look down their noses at you (or turn their back on you) but when your own family does it, it really hurts because you think that (a) they’d be understanding and accepting and (b) if anyone had your back in this, it would be family.

    Which is about the same time you find out that you didn’t know them as well as you thought you did and that they can be nastier about your sexuality than some stranger on the street…

    And life does go on…


    • My niece saw my post and claims that everyone there got strep throat, and that’s why I wasn’t invited. I don’t buy that excuse. But whatever, I’m not forcing myself on anyone. Like David said, two people make a family.


      • Strep throat… how convenient… and damned suspicious. But other family members were visited despite this rather contagious situation? I could have come up with a better lie than that in my sleep…


      • Yeah, especially since I remember seeing the pics of them posted from different places. The ironic thing is, until that happened, I was going to leave whatever I had to those two nieces. Not anymore.

        Liked by 1 person

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