I just realized that I haven’t to talked someone all day, and I realized that I didn’t even care. It’s a good thing I’m moving on, but it’s kind of sad at the same time. I miss the conversations.
Life is funny. You never if that stranger you say hi to is going to eventually change your life in some way. He changed my life, and now it’s getting back to normal. Or at least as normal as I can get.
People change, and so do situations. I have changed. I’ve let go. Sometimes I get irritated when I see him tweeting, and know that I’ve been ignored. But I’m not chasing anyone. If he doesn’t have the courtesy to reply to me, then I’m done talking.
It’s just weird how we went from talking 2-6 hours a night, to only talking 2 or 3 times a week. He has his life, and I have mine. But I do just miss talking.
It’s not easy letting go, but it is necessary. To be honest, I don’t want to let go. But I don’t want to hold on either. I need to be at peace with being friends. My feelings are not going away, I know that. But I need to separate the friendship from the love. I will always love my friend, but I don’t want to be in love.
I know I sound like a broken record. I’ve been on this topic so many times. I’m mostly in a good place. I have a few moments when I get too emotional, but I can deal with that. He’s a friend, and I need to get that into my mind. We don’t talk every day like we used to. I’m trying to convince myself that is a good thing. But I miss my friend too.
Oh, well. Life goes on. I knew it had to happen. I knew it was going to happen. But yeah, it still makes me a little sad. I’ll survive.