I happen to be a very shy, very introverted person. I never got out much. So, as a result, I met almost all my lovers (a total of 6) through work, or looking for work.
My first one was the summer of 1990. I was 23. That was a rough summer for me. I was being stalked/harassed by a fellow employee. I had a real fear that he would rape me. I had told him I was a virgin, hoping that he would respect that, and leave me alone. It had the opposite effect. He groped me at work soon after that. I reported him to managers, and they just told him to apologize.
He ended up getting sent back to jail for violating his probation (I should have reported him to his probation officer) but he was still calling me at work from jail. Anyway, during that same time, I was flirting with another cook. He was hot, and I really liked him. One night after work, I just decided to go for it.
A few months later, I moved to Delaware. A year after that, I got a job in a restaurant here in Dover. And then I moved in with another co worker. This guy named Leroy worked with both of us. He happened to be visiting our apartment one night when I decided to get drunk. I ended up having an affair with him for a few months.
I met the third guy through my roommate, who was my co worker. So it was sort of work related too. That was just a hook up. At that point in my life, I just didn’t care.
So, anyway…I moved back to Miami in the summer of 1992. I applied at a Denny’s there. I didn’t get a job, but I ended up with a boyfriend from Nicaragua. I had some interesting experiences with him. That only lasted a short time, because Hurricane Andrew happened, and I never saw him again after that.
I moved back to Delaware in the fall of 1992. I managed to hook up with another cook. That was another short time thing. To me, I call 1992 my slut phase. To some people, 5 lovers does not seem like much, but it is/was to me.
In October of 1992, I met this tall, blue eyed guy at work. I found out that he had been in the navy, and most recently had been stationed in Key West. To me, that was south Florida, and “home”. I talked to him every chance I got. I once spent my entire break talking to him. (That’s a big deal to someone who stands for 8 hours a shift)
I didn’t realize it at the time, but I flirted with him. He never picked up on it. Then in early January, I asked him out on some wild impulse I still don’t understand. He said yes. We’ve been inseparable since that first date. That was over 22 years ago.
You can judge me however you feel like it. My past is my past. It’s nothing to brag about it, but that’s how things happened. I don’t know how things would have happened if I hadn’t asked my husband out. I doubt he would have asked me out, because he just does not pick up on hints.
So, with the exception of my first boyfriend in college, everyone I was involved with was through work. And sometimes that really didn’t end well. But that’s life, it’s messy and unpredictable.I still believe things are meant to happen to learn from them. I’m grateful for the things that taught me to appreciate the good guy when I finally found him.